I’ve been meaning to write this blog for a while, as there are
so many sceptics regarding Diana’s BPD. Whenever someone raises doubt that
Diana was in fact Borderline, I automatically assume that they know very little
about Borderline Personality Disorder.
Born in the year of the Royal Wedding, I grew up loving Princess Diana. There isn’t a biography of hers that I haven’t read. Of course I pay particular attention to Her True Story, by Andrew Morton because we now know that she contributed directly to its contents, even down to its editing which she did by hand. It’s the closest we have to her autobiography.
Not being rude or meaning to sound arrogant, but is seems
clear to me that anyone who know basic facts about Diana’s life, and basic
diagnostic criteria for BPD would come to the same conclusion I have - slam
dunk diagnosis. Diana was Borderline.
But before we even look at the evidence, first we must wipe
the slate clean of the idea that attributing this personality disorder to
Princess Diana is in any way derogatory. Stigma 101 associates shame with all
types of mental illness and BPD is one of the most maligned conditions in the
field of mental health so it’s important to spell this out.
Borderline Personality Disorder is a condition produced by a
combination of environmental factors and genetic predisposition. It has no more to do with a person’s
character than a broken leg has to do with that person’s character.
Proposing that Diana had BPD and investigating the evidence
to support that claim is important. She was a very well known, much loved
figure and, like all human beings, her public life can be better understood
when we understand more about her private life.
Some will (I want to say ignorantly, but I’ll settle for
falsely) argue that it is an insult to her memory to associate her with any
mental condition, let alone BPD. I disagree. The truth is always worth hearing.
And in this case, Diana is as inspirational in death as she was in life, being
who she was.
Diana was deeply invested in helping those in society she
saw as being the most maligned, and most needing care. As she said herself, “Anywhere I see suffering, that is
where I want to be, doing what I can.”
During her life Diana was open about her pain. She spoke
about her bulimia, her depressions, her self-mutilation, her suicide attempts,
and her chronic feelings of emptiness and loneliness.
“When no one listens to you, or you feel no one’s listening to you, all
sorts of things start to happen,” she said.
“You have so much pain inside yourself that
you try and hurt yourself on the outside because you want help, but it’s the
wrong help you’re asking for … I didn’t like myself; I was ashamed because I
couldn’t cope with the pressures.”
She talked about what she looked for in a romantic partner,
“I just want someone to be there for me, to make me feel safe and secure.”
She was known to have intense
interpersonal relationships with individuals, and then one day without notice,
cut them off. She was known to have intense mood swings, and is quoted as
joking about them to her private secretary, “Stand by for a mood swing, boys!”
She was known, especially early
in the marriage, to throw huge (sometimes) violent tantrums, or to scream and
cry hysterically when arguing. By her own account she cut herself and at least
in one instance threw herself down a flight of stairs in response to Prince
Charles leaving Balmoral.
There are countless examples of
her problems with relationships, behaviours that were harmful to her and her
intense, almost unbearable suffering.
Diana was open about her extremely low self-esteem.
When speaking about the attention she received during Royal Tours in the
earlier years of her marriage. Speaking of herself in the third person she
remarked, “Little did [the public] realise
that the individual was crucifying herself inside because she didn't think she
was good enough."
I draw attention to Diana’s BPD because she
is a fantastic example of how brilliant a Borderline can be. By most accounts,
she single handedly changed the world’s understanding and attitude towards
AIDS, bulimia and land mines.
Yet sadly she did not live in a time that
could offer her BPD the recognition, understanding and treatment she needed and
deserved. Diana did not have to suffer the way she did in her life – none of us
do.
